Of The Past Life

Of The Past Life

You see,  if people had died, they are absolutely separated from their previous life.

But if they were given a chance to repeat their life, some of them would rather stay rot, or some of them would repeat it.

Au contraire, in my story, it wasnt about life and death. It's about the phase of my life.

The people from the past, keep coming creeping back into recent times. Not that I despise it, but more to like the memories come rushing in too fast I cant breathe.

Yup, exactly like they say, high school is the best 5 years of our lives.

Wait, I keep saying "High School Is Over" to my friends but me myself havent really get over it. Dammit I need to taste my own medication for a change.

Maybe the regrets are chasing me.

Maybe the unborn decisions are creeping me.

Maybe the unfinished job are grabbing me from the back.

The more I think about them, the more I wanna return to the past. 

To undo all my wrong doings, to do what I really needed to do.

But time waits for no one.

Time is like a sword, if you did not pass them over, they will cut you. Deep.

What I really need to do is realizing that I now live in a new community, a new life, and in a whole new world. College world.

Yup, I call this the auto-wakeup call. By myself, for myself.

High School, is over.

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Of Legends

Of Legends

Legends. Someone who you can never forget. Someone who you adore. Someone who you wanted to be. Someone who is awesome enough to inspire you to do stuff. Legends.

Legends can rise from any community. Yes, this is the real world, not some wizardy school or institution for mutants. Politics, for example, holds many legends through out the year. Dalai Lama, Mahatma Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln, Mahathir Mohamad, and Prophet Mohamad. All of them are legends.

But in this post I wanted to tell you guys about the legends of my school. Yup, Sekolah Dato' Abdul Razak.

Why this post Yuri? All of a sudden?

Simply because I dreamt all 5 of them last night. And their faces are crystal clear. I have no idea why all of the came into my dream. Even one of them is married.

In 2005, I was in Form 1. 

In 2005, I already knew who I would like to look up to. 

The High Committee of Student Leaders.

Syukur Syaari. The Leader.

Hisyamudin. The Brain.

Songkok. The Just.

Ashraf. The Badass.

Apai. The Muscle.

Trust me, after this deadly 5 combination, there is no other leaders in the school that can top them off.

Especially Syukur Syaari. 

Well, here's about my dream.

We were all sitting around a table, with a girl (presumably his newly-wed wife) and we were talking something about leaving highschool.

And, odd enough, they are asking me about life opinion. Like should they do that, and should they go here and there. I mean like, they're the seniors, and I'm the junior, what should I know?

But then all people say, dream is just a movie in your sleep right?

I mean, it was so awesome to meet them again, all in one place, although it's on my dream, but still, I really treasure it. 

It was really weird though, but it was awesome, you know.

Even up till now, those are the type of person I am really looking up to be one day. Especially Syukur Syaari. 

And maybe this dream came to me just after watching Awkward's Jenna Hamilton getting the attention in school and looking at the photo of Syukur and Mentol in the UK. 

Who knows. :)

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Of Photos of Twitpic

Of Photos of Twitpic

Memories can't be kept forever, but photos can freeze them at least.

So along the journey of my life, I took a hell lot photos. Step by step, I've uploaded to Friendster, then MySpace, then Facebook, then Twitpic, then Instagram.

So the most exciting portion of these social media is of course Twitpic and Instagram. Where the hipsters telling you how does a Starbucks' cup looked like, how does their lunch looked like, or how cute is their cat.

So yes, Im a part of that 'lame' community.Hey it's all good to me as long as I dont hurt other people.

But today, 11th of December 2012, how shockingly I found that ALL OF THE PHOTOS I HAVE TAKE SINCE I STARTED TWITTER IS GONE. And the photos linked to Instagram? Also poof!

What the fuck is going on? Urghh this shit is stressful I tell yo ass. 

Anybody who's reading this, if you know any resolutions, oh please put your comment below.

Thanks in advance.

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Of Speech's Retract-ability

Of Speech's Retract-ability

Bonjour.

Everybody got their own opinion. Everybody wants to be heard. Everybody wants their opinion to be heard.

And I'm one part of that "Everybody."

But what happens when your voice-out doesn't get the approval from the others? You back out. But once said, cannot be un-said, no? Well, here's how the story begin.

On the night of celebration (we don't know what are we celebrating)

Two girls and two guys are having the time of their lives, hanging out, going to a bar, get drunk, strolling in the park and all. Preferably named Gina and Norah. And the guys Jake and Kev.

 

No, they are not couples, lovers, or whatever subs name you may can ever come up with. They're just your regular bestfriends and plus, Jake is playing for the other team.

At the midst of the fun, one party pooper came and telling that they need to shush down at the park since everybody is hanging there too. But alas, they're get too carried away by being together and the party pooper started to get pissed of.

So in the mind to the party pooper, she thought, "Who the fuck they think they are? What, like they own this fucking park or something? Shit, they need to get out of here." And yes, she kinda said that to Jake and friends already. But what has been said can't be taken back.

and I was like,

The spoilers decided to call the cops. Within just few minutes, park cops came by and arrested all four of them. And the party ended. You can't even begin to imagine how shameful it was for them. Like if you call having a zits on your wedding day is shameful, try having a baby on your 15th Birthday.

You see, Jake and friends havent done anything wrong, but the fact that she think she's right all the way to the core, she called the cops, acting like the park is fucking hers. 

After the incident and all, she, the party pooper, came up and apologize to Jake. But she did not apologize to everyone, just Jake. Like what, you have humiliated them all, but since you've apologized, you're even?

Oh hell no sister, Jake and friends hard to accept apologies. They will forgive, but they wont forget. 

And like any other grown ups except Najib Razak, they all went to a debate, or a talk. Face to face.

She cried and cried knowing that her style of ambushing wasnt right and stuff like that. Gina, Norah, Jake and Kev did not have any mercy for her. They keep lashing her out in a soft but Gillette sharp kinda way.

And trust me, she learnt how to approach people the hard way.

So the lesson is, before you start to speak of something, make sure you either have stuff to back it up, or not having any regrets after saying it. If you do, then you better shush. Or else, you know what they say "Terlajak perahu boleh diundur, terlajak kata buruk padahnya." And padah yang buruk bakal menyusul.

p/s : This story has nothing to do with any living forms, just something that I gotta take out from my chest. 

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Of Inner Debacle

Of Inner Debacle

Living outside of the country is hard. Yes, nobody said it was easy, especially when you're high-maintenanced. 

I admit, talk all you want, but I'm high-maintenanced.

In fact, think me of a Bentley. High-maintenanced, but gives you a real pleasure riding it. 

There you go, about me.

This is where the story starts.

As I am now,  I hardly be able to wake up early in the morning. The earliest I ever remember is at 9. And class starts at 9. Motherfucker.

And you all should know too that I aint no living alone. But with 3 other friends. 

And two of them is the early riser.

You better believe me by saying this, but this morning, ALL OF THEM ARE ACTING LIKE A TOTAL DIPSHIT. 

What? Do you guys forget that you have another face in the house? We literally see each other's fucking face like every seconds, cockface! And yet you wake up early, WAKE EACH OTHER UP, clean yourselves, put on shoes in front of the mirror before going to class, BUT NOT WAKING ME THE FUCK UP??

I mean like, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCKITY FUCKING FUCK??

I only woke up listening to their laugh and fucking chatting blablabla in front of the mirror before heading out.

Then I'm up, make my worst fucking wake-up-grumpy face (everybody knows how scary that shit is) and say "Korang tak kejut aku ke?" and the Kelantanese was like "Owh, ea?"

I was like, "THAT'S NOT EVEN THE FUCKING APPROPRIATE RESPONSE, MOTHERFUCKER!"

But fuck that, Imma go to the toilet and brush some teeth and face wash the fuck up.

Then I put on my fresh face, head to the kitchen. And the Chinese talked to me about something, and I didnt even look at him, and I dont even say a shit. COZ I AINT GIVIN ANY SHIT.

RIGHT? I KNOW RIGHT? What the fuck Yuri, pissed like hell just because people didnt wake you up.

Well, we're living together in one house, so the least you can do is share, or help each other. 

Heck, I even used my money first to pay the bill, bitch!

This is why I call myself high-maintenanced. 

And yes, the upside of having me is, I really do care about the cleanliness. I mopped the kitchen floor, I wash the bathroom, I clean the fucking bathtub, I cook meals, basically Im the mother of this house. A mother, fucking, MOTHER. Respect that shit, niggas.

Like I said, Im like a Bentley. Preserve me, then everything'll be perfect. 

 But all your fucktards has crossed the line and I aint no happy with that shit. Imma make sure all of you suffer. When I say shit like this, you better believe Imma do it. 

So there you go. The Homely Drama. 

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That Feeling

That Feeling

Greetings.  Have you ever had that hate feeling to a certain someone without any apparent reason?

The answer : Yes.

Awh come on, we all arent a saint.

So it all happened to me when I first laid my eyes on him. And instantly, poof! "Yup, I hate that guy."

This one particular guy, lemme call him Buff. 

Buff has this one habit (which is not really annoying or anything but I still hate it),
which includes getting along with people that arent one of his family. You get me?
And to add to that, Buff also likes to make decision without the agreement of others. acting like he's the big boss and all.

Whenever Buff is making his decision, lemme give ya an example, Buff wanted to decorate the wall of his class with some rainbows and cupcakes and put some glitters on em too and he just asked "Do we agree to decorate this wall?" without a split second when everybody trynna open their mouth to throw an answer, "Looks like it's a yes!", said Buff.

Well this is sad. Buff isnt particularly one of the varsity-wearing, rugby-throwing, weed-smoker, beer-drinker, you get what I mean, kinda person. He's more like the down to earth kinda guy. He's a good guy, no doubt about that, but then you ask yourself : "Then why did Yuri hated him?" And then I asked you to scroll up again to read the intro.

I'm also sensing that Buff realized that I hated him. Well, obviously, when people wanted to hear my opinion, he shuts me down. And like what other fighting nations do, they shut any loop of chance their enemy have real tight. And bam! You have no chance to enter.

This also made me realize that I'm not the only guy who can scam and plan and stuff over here.
Looks like I got a new contender. 

Before I end this, please, if you're reading this, the phase where I-Really-Dont-Give-A-Shit-About-Mostly-Anything has arrived in my life. 

So I really doesnt mind whether people do read my blog or not. 

I wanna be like Jenna. Jenna Hamilton.

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Of Superpower or Mortal.

Of Superpower or Mortal.

The headline should've be "With great power, comes great responsibility."
But I just wanna mix things up so.

This week has been real hectic. Got UMNO Club Meetings, and two junior classes to be tutored. And yes, Im the tutor.

And honestly, I managed to juggle it all together thanks to nothing. 

And recently, my batchmates wanted to organize some Family Day with games and picnic in the open field beside El-Baron the cakehouse. And boy how surprised am I when Risha told me I should've been chosen to be the director.

Thank God that never happened! My plate is full! 

and also the position for the Discipline Officer? Thank, but no,  thanks.

The thing that I learn in this week is, if you're not capable enough or aint got no time to do it, then dont take it. Or else,  people're gonna view you different. I mean, in a slightly bad perspective. I feel sorry for that kinda person.

They say experience is the best teacher, hell right they are! 

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Offspring of My Stress

Offspring of My Stress

Everybody got their own stress. Perhaps from the studies, pressure of work, dateline getting near, highschool being a bitch, or even your cat died.

Well mine was quite the obvious from the last post.

So as the result of that, Im having the worst breakout of my life.

Zits.

 And no, for those who are watching MTV's Awkward, this is not a kiss blisters or herpes.

I'm definitely free STD.

All the zits are lining up under the angle of mandible, which leaves me wondering, are they trying to hurt me secretly without making it obvious to everybody? 

Like in the situation of you having the worst fight with your better half but you gotta act all happy couple during a party. 

The medical supply to fight this breakout is getting depleted, and the bank? Already depleted like humanity in the Israel.

 Trust me, this stress right now Im having is directly continuous from the study week last week. Thanks to that jerk.

But whatever it is, Im struggling to juggle between making my notes, updating this blog, revising and teaching other students, UMNO Club meetings, learning French, cooking and not mentioning working out. 

My plate's sorta full already. Boom goes my social life.

And yes, I have been distancing myself for the past, IDK, from the start of this new semester? Yup.

But this is just another phase Im going through. Like the S-Phase a cell going through after mitotic division, yes, exactly like me. the Silent Phase.

Maybe this silence I'm practicing is probably for the best. Im trying to NOT to know any or every gossip here, as last year, I almost destroyed the life of my friend. He almost stopped from studying here. Lucky I act fast and save the situation, just like what you should do in the case of Thyrotoxic Storm.

And yes, my neck( ironically) is a mess. i pray to God my gland to stop clogging and breaking out again. 

What are you, Prison Breaking?

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The Wheel of Life

The Wheel of Life

We all know that life is like a wheel. I know, it;s kinda cheesy right? But bear in mind, wheels doesnt have any endings or upper part and lower part.

So my side of the story today is about my life. It's pretty screwed right now, all thanks to my pere.

We all know living without money is crazy hard. Esp when they come from a cheapskate
pere.
Just because I picked him up one hour and half late from his class, 
he raged up all the way to hell for like what, 3 months now?

And I was like, "You're joking right?"I dont really know where he got the idea of punishing 
his petit garcon by halting the argent from flowing into the bank account.
And I was really suffocated. Literally. 
How can one survive without food? or books?

Hell, I even gotta borrow my friend's money to pay for my fees, 
JUST BECAUSE MY FATHER DID NOT GIVE ME ANY MONEY.

Im not saying from the richiebitch point of view, Im sayin this from a poor broke
hobo guy point of view.

The essentiality to grow up from what has happened is DESPERATELY needed in the event. 
En plus, he said I have to apologize first then I can talk to him. 
Abordable, I apologized before I left the car at the KLIA, and then I apologized again 
before I went down The Escalator, and he said I needed to apologize. 
What gives?

With some of my cranky savings in here and there pocket pants kinda bank, 
I managed to topup my phone and subscribedBlackberry Internet Service. 
Wanna know how poor I am?I only subscribed for one day. That's all. 
And the I apologize to him ONCE AGAIN, and he aint replying.This has got to stop. 

You need to grow up. That's what you need to do.

I thought family first. That's a bullshit.

So this is the part where my life turned from awesome roller -coaster ride, to rock bottom. 

And I dont see the way out yet. 

If only I'm a doctor by now.

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